Self Concept, Self Esteem & Self Confidence

Back in the cave person days, the humans focused only on survival. This meant having safe shelter at night, food to eat and not being attacked by a predator. Back than, the cave person’s brain focused on conserving energy and avoiding risks. Which means, our ancestors got a dopamine hit every time they were or felt safe.

The modern human brain is evolved, but the reward driven dopamine requirement is still in there. Also the speed of reward timing has changed. For most of the population on earth finding shelter and food is much easier now then it was back then. So we’ve adapted to finding new ways to get that dopamine hit – enter manifestation, the pursuit of goals and just having control over the chaos.

Our current society is little broken. We lack a sense of identity or tie it the wrong places (e.g. career, marriage or something else outside of ourselves). With the re-emergence of the idea of the “self concept” (thanks for social media which has amplified it) by adjusting our own understanding of who we are (or our self concept) we can quickly achieve anything we want.
Although the speed at which we can attain these goals can vary, I do believe that having a strong self concept can help us achieve goals, raise our vibrations and improve our brain’s neuron pathways for change and plasticity.

First let’s start with some definitions.

Self Concept is the belief and underlying image you have of yourself. It can initially be separate from your emotions or feelings but when it is enhanced by your underlying emotions – it is usually enhanced and can be ferociously strong and therefore something you strongly desire to attain. Self Concept can operate in your current 3D and can be used as a tool to attract a desirable state that you do not currently see in your 3D. (meaning Self Concept can be tuned beyond your current reality)

Self Image is literally how you see yourself in the 3D. This means self image is more about your current self, roles, characteristics and even how you look. Self image is shaped by your lived experience, memories and feedback – but its really how you think people view you.

Self Esteem is the emotional weight you have on your self image. Self esteem is often tied to how worthy you believe you are, or even how much respect you have for yourself. Self esteem is based on your internal standards and emotional responses – which means self esteem can be diminished based on how we judge ourselves but it’s helps us understand how we feel about ourselves.

Having an understanding about these are important because self-concept is the one that can be changed and repositioned to help manifest our goals. Neville Goddard spoke about this a lot in his work – specically about the “Law of Assumption”. And there are 3 main ways you can transform your self concept.

  1. Identify it
  2. Assume it is true
  3. Live from the end

Whether it’s affirmations, mirror talk, future self journaling/gratitude lists, embodying and living as that manifestation. Although I do most of these, I do feel that embodying the self concept I’m striving for is the most efficient way to achieve your desires. You aren’t necessarily waiting for something to happen, you are going out and making it happen in your current 3D.

Say you want to be an published author. Instead of thinking about it or trying to be inspired by reading about other authors – commit to behaving like one every day. Whether that’s writing one paragraph in your journal, typing 500 words from your outline or editing something you’ve written previously. Embodying the behaviours of an author or any goal you desire is the best way to improve your self concept and manifest your dreams.

Affirming it and be delusional about it happening (detaching from a the timing) is great but over sometimes we can get in our own head about things. A negative mindset hates a moving target, and our brains can’t tell the difference between a goal achieved and goal thought about – so might as well do both!

Get out of a slump with me

Since our big family trip to Hong Kong-India-Dubai, I’ve been a slump. 

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been getting things done, been ambitious, goal oriented but not with all areas of my life.  I’ve really felt like consistency has been out of focus. 

Which is interesting to read back as I write it, because on paper (and instagram highlights) I’ve done some pretty cool stuff: ran a half marathon, did some community environment events, re-did my vision board, meditated and journaled daily, making time to learn (GenAI, microcerts, exams PASSED) made lots of little art and launched my youtube channel.  But I feel like I’ve been lacking organization, regularity and stability.  Which then has turned around and effected other areas of my life. 

For example

  • I’ve only read 1 book, yes just ONE book this year and we are already 7 months in
  • My eating habits have been so out of it lately (including late night snacking, lack of portion control/meal planning, not enough protein and over indulgence ugh)
  • My schedule for sharing my art or blogging… literally out the window
  • Getting pictures printed (this is a digital age problem, like how much storage is there in the world and why do I take soo many pictures and do nothing with them)
  • Someone tell me why I don’t do ab/core exercises daily anymore
  • An atrocious sleep schedule
  • Procrastination on some important personal goals 

Anyways I’m sharing this because I know I’ll get back on track.  I’m setting up systems (including a new planner and digital productivity method), starting therapy and strengthening my visualization practice because I want to reap the benefits of good habits and mental fitness in my life.  I truly believe being mentally strong is the foundation of life productivity.  I think once I have my mindset correct, I’ll be able to re-create habits and routines to support my goals.

All this to say, is it’s okay to fumble, it’s okay to fall down and it’s okay to take rest.  The important thing is to have the awareness to realize what’s going on and the desire to course correct.

As always I like to share some tips on getting back on track 

  1. Do a brain dump:  If you feel like your daily routine, goals, thoughts and mind are feeling a little frazzled, do yourself a favour and WRITE.IT.ALL.DOWN.  Whatever IT is. This means it could be a brain dump, but it could also being a let out of all your feelings.  Let your pen/keys on keyboard go freely so you release what ever is holding you back emotionally or spiritual.
  2. Listen to your intuition: which means you’ll have to be quite.  You’ll have to turn inwards.  You’ll have to pay attention to the small and mighty messages both your body and universe are giving you. Remember not everything deserves your attention, but its important to work on the things that your intuitively know will get you where you need to be.
  3. Take intentional action: meaning if you are ready (mentally and inuititively) to incorporate activities to get you back on track, don’t try to boil the ocean.  Stick to 1-2 main activities daily.  Small wins everyday lead to accomplishing big dreams.
  4. Give yourself Grace: Rest and relaxation is key here.  Not letting negative self talk overrun your mind and dictate your mood is of the upmost important.

Looking for more inspiration?

Read this: 30 ways to get 1% better 

Watch this:

Quick ways to shift your energetic state

✨ interrupt anxiety with deep breaths

✨ interrupt worry with thoughts of gratitude

✨ interrupt sadness with seeking the humour

✨ interrupt overwhelm with movement of the body

✨ interrupt fear with courageous action

✨ interrupt boredom with spontaneous play

5 top ways to be more confident in your career

One thing about me, is if I can share my wisdom I will.  I do a lot of mentoring in my corporate girlie life.  And I also look for opportunities to be mentored.  I’ve had a few great mentors over the years who have guided, protected and propelled me – so I really feel passionate about giving back.

Sometimes, those mentors are in my company, in my personal life or even virtual.

So consider me your virtual mentor!  I hope these tips can help you exude more confidence in your job, career, big dreams and beyond.

  1. Don’t take personalities or communication styles personally
    I find that as adults making friends is a hit or miss. There is such a mix of characters and preferred ways of interacting that we can be friendly with some and frenemies with others. The same applies in the workplace. There is also a mix of personalities and communication styles (cultures and genders can add to the bag). Remind yourself that when people are being direct, it is not personal.
  2. Stop putting others on a pedestals
    If you think other people around are better or smarter than you, because of a certain job title, project they are on or experience – they probably arent. And you can prevent the feeling of under confidence by not assuming people are better than you purely based on what you see. Remember everyone is going through something, even if you can’t see it.
  3. Assume you are doing well (unless you are told otherwise)
    Managers have a responsibility to have transparent conversations with their employees about work activities and performance. So unless you are being told otherwise, assume everything is going well!
  4. Remind yourself its not that serious
    Perspective is important. Remember if it won’t matter in 5 years, don’t spend 5 seconds thinking about it. Zoom out and get a higher point of view. Put in an honest effort, but don’t lose sleep or miss your breaks/PTO because of it.
  5. Reframe your negative thoughts into positive ones
    We often think the worse in every situation. It actually takes more effort and energy to negative than positively. If you feel like you are asking too many questions, remind yourself that you want to have clarity. But also if you get feedback that at first stings, take it as an opportunity to improve.

Journal prompts for your birthday!

If you know me (or have been around my blog for a few years) you know that I love to journal and truly believe in the benefits of journaling

Journalling is a form of therapy.  It offers a mental and emotional release that you may not even know you need.  Furthermore, using journal prompts offers a quiet reflection and forces us to be honest and thoughtful.

For my birthday this year, I chose a few birthday journal prompts to get me to both intentionally reflect on the past 12 months and refocus on the year ahead.

  1. How are you celebrating your birthday (today, this weekend, later this week/month)?
  2. When you think about the last 12 months, what is 1 word that immediately comes to mind? why?
  3. What happened this year that you are so grateful for?
  4. How have you stepped out of your comfort zone this year?
  5. If you could speak to yourself 10 years from, what would you say to yourself? What would Older Self say to you?

Do you use Journal Prompts? Which journal prompts do you love to use?  

Happy Journaling!


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b-roll is life

Google what b-roll is and you’ll see that “it is essential in narrative features to create a sense of time and place and to add layers of meaning to a story.”

When we think about life, we think mainly about the starting points and accomplishments.  But we hear so very often to “enjoy the ride”.  The ride could be any combination of the daily mundane, errands, simple pleasures and maybe even stumbles.  And it’s the ride that is b-roll.  As someone who is a creative and who is constantly documenting life – I know that b-roll is life.