So glad I can come back to my self-care rituals

This week was a great reminder as to why I need self care rituals.  On the days that I am pushed to my breaking point, by situations, by people, by context – it is my self care rituals that give me peace.

My rituals are the the part of my day that make sure when I am out there taking care of everyone and everything else – that I also make time for myself and my wellness.

Self care rituals are THE FORMULA to support your mental wellbeing.

It’s a built in way that you do something for your mind, your body and your soul everyday.

Another reminder: Get enough sleep, have gratitude and always be present (aka put your phone down and you head up) 

How to find your why + a small exercise!

You might have heard the popular sayings:

Come back to your why!

What’s your why?

Find your purpose!

I’ve been hearing it for years.  But I’ve only recently made the connection.  This is the way I see it: Passion is a day dream, but purpose is a S.M.A.R.T goal on your “life’s to-do list”.  Passion is about doing something because you have an emotional connection to it.  Purpose is direction and the reason for which something is done.  Purpose is fuelled by reasoning and usually the reasoning is the answer to a why question.

OOTD, Why Statement, Purpose over Passion, Follow your heart, Know your why, Purpose filled life, New World, Style, Creative, Big Magic, Goal Setting OOTD, Why Statement, Purpose over Passion, Follow your heart, Know your why, Purpose filled life, New World, Style, Creative, Big Magic, Goal Setting

It’s the answer to your why aka your why statement that gives you motivation to do what you do.  Your why statement will be the reminder you need to keep moving in the direction of your purpose.  For individuals your why statement is not only your purpose, it’s who you are, your cause, what you stand for or your belief.  Of course many companies and organizations identify their why statement as a way to keep employees motivated in their work.  So why shouldn’t individuals have a why statement for their lives?

Your individual why statement is evergreen.  That means it makes sense and is applicable to any part of your life, whether that’s your career, your hobbies or your life overall.  It is simple, actionable and expressed in affirmative language that resonates with you.

Employees who have identified their why statements are clear in their direction and therefore are more inspired to do the work they feel compelled to do.

OOTD, Why Statement, Purpose over Passion, Follow your heart, Know your why, Purpose filled life, New World, Style, Creative, Big Magic, Goal Setting OOTD, Why Statement, Purpose over Passion, Follow your heart, Know your why, Purpose filled life, New World, Style, Creative, Big Magic, Goal Setting OOTD, Why Statement, Purpose over Passion, Follow your heart, Know your why, Purpose filled life, New World, Style, Creative, Big Magic, Goal Setting OOTD, Why Statement, Purpose over Passion, Follow your heart, Know your why, Purpose filled life, New World, Style, Creative, Big Magic, Goal Setting OOTD, Why Statement, Purpose over Passion, Follow your heart, Know your why, Purpose filled life, New World, Style, Creative, Big Magic, Goal Setting OOTD, Why Statement, Purpose over Passion, Follow your heart, Know your why, Purpose filled life, New World, Style, Creative, Big Magic, Goal Setting

Organizations who see this as a win will support employees and employees will be more engaged at work.  I recently participated in an innovation program at work.  The experience was both challenging and awakening.

Part of that awakening was determining my why statement.  Here is an EASY exercise to find yours.

Tools: poster board, post its notes (standard size & few different colours), permanent markers, chart paper.
You don’t need any of these tools, but using actual paper products, pens and a wall helps your body and brain align and really get into this activity.

Step 1: Think about your life and brainstorm 5-10 times you felt most successful and then felt most challenged.  Once you have these memories are listed (on your post it notes, piece of paper or word doc), review everything and try to notice any patterns.  You may start to see some themes pop up like “team work”, “technology”, “lack of control” or “creativity” – the number of themes doesn’t but finding the themes does.

Step 2: Based on your themes, take note of your motivators.  This will help you understand what your contribution to others lives will be and the value of those contributions

Step 3: Write your why statement with this format “To ____, so that _____”.  The first blank is your contribution and the second blank is the impact of that contribution.  This should come easily but also may be an iterative process (ie: write down your statement, then tweak it a bit, write it out again, change a little something and write it again – continue this process until you have something you feel good about).

Step 4: Share your why statement.  Share it with your partner, your kids, your friends, your co-workers.  Share it on twitter, on blogs, on IG and in whatsapp/teams/webex chats!  It will be easy to share your why statement because it’s all you so there will be a level of pride and excitement.

And in the spirit of sharing, this is my why statement:

To create and lead an agile team, so that we build transformative solutions, achieve goals and inspire people.

Also it’s okay if you aren’t ready to share it or if you feel like the wording is a little off.  Keep at it, you’ll get it to where it needs to be and be thrilled to share it with the world!

 

Fireside chat with a group of working moms

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A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to attend a fire side chat hosted by a panel of working moms.

I am in a phase of my life where I look for inspiration from other moms, namely other working moms.  I love receiving advice on how to find a complementary lifestyle between career and home, but also other important facets of one’s life like hobbies, fitness and personal growth.

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Being in a technology / software development industry, I mainly hear from women in IT.  But this group of mom’s was different kind of panel: they were a group of working mom’s in health care.

Yep doctors…!   The type of people who give up their lives for the wellness of others.  Surprisingly, what they deal with as mom’s is the same as what every other mom deals with!

Thought I’d share some of the topics that were discussed:

  1. Ask for help: Everyone’s need and type of help is different, but the important thing is to actually be okay with asking and accepting help. For some of us it can be full time paid help (like a nanny / daycare) or it could be having a baby sitter two times a month to help out for date night.  One idea that I hadn’t thought of is befriending other parents.  Invite your child’s friends over for playdates and work on those parent friendships – they could come in handy when you are in a pinch. 
  2. Sacrifice:  Every day is a sacrifice when you are mom who works outside of the home. (Hell when you are a mom period!) You are either a great mom and not giving your career your everything or you are a killing it on the career front and neglecting your duties at home.  One thing to remember is that your kids will be okay and better for it seeing you pursue something that challenges you and makes you feel happy.  Ditch the guilt and quiet the voices.
  3. Time away from your career:  Taking a mat leave will effect your career or business – there is no doubt about that.  Your career and business will struggle during mat leave and afterwards for a bit. That’s inevitable!  Create a plan to figure out how you want to move up and keep your eyes on the prize.
  4. Plan when to have your babies:   There is no right time but having a solid handle on your finances will help.
  5. What motivates you to keep going in your career:  All the mom’s had really interesting reasons so I feel the need to share them all:
    • “I felt a need to do something just for me”
    • “I wanted to provide for my kids, give them the things I couldn’t have in my childhood”
    • my passion became my purpose”

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