Book Review – What I know For Sure

Posted on September 16, 2019 by Bhanu Misra Marya

A few weeks ago I finished the book “What I know For Sure” by Oprah. I really enjoyed reading it. It felt like I was reading the journal of an older sister or mentor. I felt like taking pictures of every paragraph or sentence of paragraph that gave me that “aha” feeling. I soon realized that I’d be taking more pictures than actually reading and appreciating the book.

I was never an Oprah fan. Well I wouldn’t say I am now either. I do watch the occasional Soul Circle video on Instagram and listen to an episode of her podcast here or there. I don’t think I would ever go to her live talks though (just because I am not the biggest fan of concerts and large audience events). But when a smart, successful, creative, mindful, ambitious, knows-what-she-wants-and-goes-after-it woman immortalizes her experiences and thoughts into a book – yep for sure I’ll be all over that.

The book is all the wisdom Oprah gained from when she was very young to her current age. Life lessons, inspiration, revelations and thoughtful trinkets. It’s the kind of book that I’d want to buy (yep I borrowed it from the library) and fold page corners, highlight and bookmark so much of this book because the advice is relatable and genuine.

Here are a few lines that I want to share:

On reading…

I now consider reading a good book a sacred indulgence. […] What I know for sure is that reading opens you up, exposes you and gives you access to anything your mind can hold. […] Reading gives you the ability to reach higher ground. And keep climbing.

On Resiliency…

The only way to endure the quake is to adjust your stance.

On Gratitude…

What you focus on expands. When you focus on the goodness in your life, you create more of it.

On doing your life’s work…

I’ve come to believe that each of us has a personal calling that’s as unique as a fingerprint – and that the best way to succeed is to discover what you love and then find a way to offer it to others in the form of service, working hard, and also allowing the energy of the universe to lead you.

Check out the other books I’ve ready in 2019!

Fall back into Action!

Posted on September 3, 2019 by Bhanu Misra Marya

“Soar, eat ether, see what has never been see; depart, be lost, but climb” // Edna St. Vincent Millay

I love September! Fresh start, crisp mornings, new recipes, tall boots, beautiful fall photography :)

September has always felt like the start of a New Year of Learning. And although I no longer am in school or formal education, it’s important for me to remember that I should continue to grow and learn. I try to do this as often and as easily I can by: doing new things, reading books, listening to podcasts/Ted Talks or simply by changing my perspective to understand a topic more deeply. I often forget that it’s okay to feel overwhelmed or confused some days. It’s on those days that I need to take a time to rest and recover but also not forget to keep my goal in mind and continue to scale that mountain.

I am taking this this upcoming month to fall back into action! I want to get back into good routines and stay focused. I put together this checklist to keep me motivated and ahead of my goals as we move into the colder months!

Going to weddings with our kiddos

Posted on July 4, 2019 by Bhanu Misra Marya

The last 2 weekends were spent busy with weddings. It’s definitely a different season of life we are in, as we are attending weddings as parents of two children.

Nowadays, we always come prepared with snacks and dinner (as food is usually not served at kid friendly times). We usually need to bring a stroller. Most of the rules we have at home go out the window for the night (i.e.: sure have some more cranberry juice, no veggies on your plate no problem!) Sitting on the floor to watch the bhangra performance is a rite of passage for a child at Indian weddings.

If you think taking kids to a wedding is a chore – you are right because you can’t really enjoy the wedding. Well that’s not entirely true sometimes you have friends and family who help out but usually it means you are leaving no later than 11:15pm. But taking your kids to a wedding (if it’s been approved by the bride and groom of course, usually Indian weddings are) is a perfect opportunity to practice teaching your kids respectful behaviour (i.e.: to be silent during the speeches or sitting still for a little longer than normal).

I personally know this time is FLEETING. There will come the day when my kids will say “nah we don’t want to come!!” :roll:

So I’ll enjoy taking them along while they don’t know they have a choice ;-)

Fireside chat with a group of working moms

Posted on May 20, 2019 by Bhanu Misra Marya

A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to attend a fire side chat hosted by a panel of working moms.

I am in a phase of my life where I look for inspiration from other moms, namely other working moms. I love receiving advice on how to find a complementary lifestyle between career and home, but also other important facets of one’s life like hobbies, fitness and personal growth.

Being in a technology / software development industry, I mainly hear from women in IT. But this group of mom’s was different kind of panel: they were a group of working mom’s in health care.

Yep doctors…! The type of people who give up their lives for the wellness of others. Surprisingly, what they deal with as mom’s is the same as what every other mom deals with!

Thought I’d share some of the topics that were discussed:

Ask for help: Everyone’s need and type of help is different, but the important thing is to actually be okay with asking and accepting help. For some of us it can be full time paid help (like a nanny / daycare) or it could be having a baby sitter two times a month to help out for date night. One idea that I hadn’t thought of is befriending other parents. Invite your child’s friends over for playdates and work on those parent friendships – they could come in handy when you are in a pinch.
Sacrifice: Every day is a sacrifice when you are mom who works outside of the home. (Hell when you are a mom period!) You are either a great mom and not giving your career your everything or you are a killing it on the career front and neglecting your duties at home. One thing to remember is that your kids will be okay and better for it seeing you pursue something that challenges you and makes you feel happy. Ditch the guilt and quiet the voices.
Time away from your career: Taking a mat leave will effect your career or business – there is no doubt about that. Your career and business will struggle during mat leave and afterwards for a bit. That’s inevitable! Create a plan to figure out how you want to move up and keep your eyes on the prize.
Plan when to have your babies: There is no right time but having a solid handle on your finances will help.
What motivates you to keep going in your career: All the mom’s had really interesting reasons so I feel the need to share them all:
- “I felt a need to do something just for me”
- “I wanted to provide for my kids, give them the things I couldn’t have in my childhood”
- my passion became my purpose”

Our minds believe what we tell it

Posted on April 16, 2019 by Bhanu Misra Marya

I’ve always been interested in how the brain works and how we can train our minds to accomplish our goals. Lately I’ve been more in tune with information specifically around learning and focusing.

I was listening to a podcast recently where I heard Jim Kwik made 2 really interesting points. He called our minds a (1) super computer and (2) that our minds are always eavesdropping on our self talk. I made an immediate connection: our minds will believe what it hears us saying to ourselves. Our self talk can be hugely centered around what our current focus is on. Whether it be school test, huge assignment at work, a negative situation or a happy moment – our mind will be listening.

I think it’s extreamly important to train our minds to think positively. I’ve always been a realest, so changing my mindset to be more positive has been a challenge. But one way to practice positive thinking is by creating a vision board. I’ve made a few over the past several years and I’ve found that it always sets me up for success. Maybe it’s subconscious or maybe it’s about how attention and energy compliment each other, but a quick google search will show you how many other people have used vision boards to bring focus to their life. Vision boards can help with goal setting by:

giving you a chance to be really intentional about what you want (your goals)
allowing you to organize your thoughts about your goals
giving you a visual reminder of your goals/dreams
creating an emotional connection to your goals

I decided to introduce Miss S to the process and journey of the vision board. I actually called it a dream board with her and I explained to her what it was and what it’s used for. She was happy to use glue, scissors and sparkle paint but surprisingly was also engaged in trying to think of the things she wanted try, learn, have or do.

The night before the exercise we discussed stuff she might want to do or see in the summer and in SK. So I got an idea of what types of images to print. I also printed some extra stuff that she didn’t mention to see if she would gravitate to those images. What was interesting was that she picked up things we hadn’t discussed and also told me she didn’t want to use images of things she mentioned in our conversation.

And now that she has her dream board hanging on her wall it’s a constant source of inspiration and a conversation trigger at bed time. Best part of doing this exercise with her? Was it actually pushed me to complete my own vision board!

Book Review – Ishmeal

Posted on April 1, 2019 by Bhanu Misra Marya

I recently finished reading Ishmeal. Which is actually an accomplishment because I started it January 2018. But I stopped reading it, just around the time I ended my mat leave.

I was recently listening to a podcast where the guest was talking about how to read more books and he said that its totally okay to “quit so you can start”.

I couldn’t have agreed more. I’ve stopped many books. I mean for me, reading as an adult… is not school, I am not going to be judged if I didn’t finish a book, there is no essay requirement and definitely no quiz. I always give a book the benefit of the doubt and try to read 25 pages or so. But, if the book hasn’t peaked my interest I’ll stop and move on to another book. The best thing about choosing to stop reading a book is that it’s not final. You can always begin reading that book again. Which is exactly what I did here.

This book essentially is about how the earth is being destroyed by humans. So the premise of this book really appeals to me. It was written in the early 90s and the entire story (well 95%) of it takes place as a conversation between a gorilla and a human.

The conversations take the reader through different times of history from Adam/Eve (i.e. “the beginning”) era through to the 90s. The reader is meant to understand why humans believe the earth was made for them, that they are above the law of community and how they have not figured out a way to live in harmony with other creatures on earth. The author describes several cultural myths and biases that seem to give humans the “excuses” to rule over the earth and continue agricultural domination.

The book tip toes around primitivism and other extreme view points to help save the earth and allow humans to live in community with other species on earth. The book has a good message to humanity, I just couldn’t get behind the some-what-extreme solution provided.

A few of the important points I will take with me after reading this book:

humans belong to the world (not the other way around)
if your know something important share it with 100 people if they feel the message is also important they should share it with 100 people (and so on and so forth)
history should be re-examined so we can continually learn from our past

Check out the other books I’ve ready in 2019!