How you dress is a reflection of your personal reality

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always felt a personal conviction to leave my house “dressed up”. I would always have my make up done, my accessories on point and ready to take an outfit shot #OnceAFashionBloggerAlwaysAFashionBlogger.

But along came motherhood, a pandemic, all sorts of geo-political situations and the desire to feel put together was cast aside. I lost “my why” or at least felt it was drowned out by all the noise around me.

However a few years ago, I remember leaving the house with a baby tow and in a very unflattering outfit (think: saggy sweatpants and uggs) feeling extremely embarrassed at the thought of running into anyone, that I vowed to never do that to myself again. It wasn’t the “running into” someone that bothered me, it was “I don’t care about myself” mentality that made me realize that in fact I do care about myself (a lot!).

How you dress is a reflection of you personality. And your personality is just your personal reality. Dr Joe Dispenza’s theorizes that our thoughts, feelings and actions (including how we dress, present ourselves etc) shape our personal reality. If the action of dressing your best forms your personal reality – a strong connection could be made for dressing in a way that represents your best and highest self – whether that be aligning your personal reality to that promotion, business owner, professional athlete or just a hot mom ;)

In all honestly, it’s been a journey to find my personal style again, but it’s fun to shop my closet, save outfit ideas on Pinterest or invest in some great pieces.

Some days I love what I’m wearing, and I sometimes still leave the house in an outfit that doesn’t hit the mark – but I’m giving myself grace (as one should!)

In an attempt to keep myself motivated, sharing a few reasons why I choose to dress well in hopes that it will inspire others to rethink their own style journey.

  1. Demonstrates confidence: How we dress creates an impact on how we are perceived by others but also how we perceive ourselves. Luckily confidence can be cultivated and is usually starts with self-love and self-care. An easy way to figure to show yourself love is buy wearing things that make you feel confident. But what outfits make you feel confident?
    An outfit that fits well and feels good – is a great place to start. Next your follow your intuition as it tell you pretty quickly that an outfit will increase your confidence. You’ll have a pep in your step, you’ll stand taller, you’ll radiate a sparkle and you won’t even need to look in a mirror to confirm – you’ll just feel it
  2. Attracts positive attention: Call it what you will: “first impression”, “pretty privilege” or “divine feminine” – dressing in a way that exudes these attributes will get you some stares but it will also give you power. You will also be perceived as more competent which in turn builds trust and credibility. I know some people will say “but we shouldn’t be judge by our appearance” but unfortunately it happens – so why not use it to your advantage. People will be drawn to you, doors will be held open for you, friendly conversations and kind stranger interactions will be had. This is all to say is that you’ll be surrounded by positivity. And in today’s world – sprinkling more positivity into our day is a MUST!
  3. Encourages creative self expression: I love to be artistic – and being creative with outfits is a form of self expression just as making a painting, junk journaling or photography would be. We all have a unique identity and show casing it in how we dress allows us as individuals to express that uniqueness and experiment with our creativity.

Evening Skincare Cocktail

Creating a skin care routine is the best thing I’ve done for my skin and my self care routine. After a few months of experimentation I’ve been able to find a combination of vitamins (in the form of serums) to help my skin restore, replenish and rejuvenate over night.
…Enter my evening skin care cocktail ;)

I like to switch up the products to address different aspects of skincare. Doing this is actually called “skin cycling”

Multi Peptides + Copper, Hyaluronic acid, Multi Peptide Lash/Brow Serum, Creamy Eye Treatment, Water Cream

Beauty Elixar, Nacinamide, Retinol, Ultra Hydrating Night Mask or Dewy Skin Cream

Nacinamide, Hyaluronic Acid, Caffeine Solution (eyes), Eye Repair cream, Hyaluronic Moisture Cream

I like to use both mid level and drug store products. But finding what works did take some trial and trial. ;)
Adopting a skin care routine is a personal practice. What I love about my routine is that it isn’t a 20 step routine. Some days can be a little more elaborate, but I always have this 5 minute routine for my every day!

8 course menu in a Cave!

I’m not a foodie, but I know trying new restaurants with friends is a love language.

The three core pillars of a restaurant experience are: ambiance, service, food (aesthetics high up on priority).

I’m also someone who will go to a new restaurant, not for the food – as a priority, but for the vibes. I love seeing and surrounding myself with beautiful things. So of course, gorgeous restaurants and how the chef’s make art on a plate are no exception.

My friend and I recently checked out And / Ore and it was spectacular. We specifically went to the Below Ground dining room.

And / Ore did not disappoint. From the moment we entered we were treated with a friendly smile, courteous service and beautiful things to look at everywhere.

The Below Ground dinning room offered an 8 course tasting menu. I had seen pictures of the plates online and thought I’d have to grab a pizza afterwards (lol). But little did I know that 8 little plates would really add up!

The presentation of the food (and the taste of most dishes) were amazing. And just check out the view of the inside, it’s like you are in an actual cave!

If you haven’t been then I highly recommend it. The menu is seasonal and uses local ingredients so I plan on going again with the Hubz.

Would love to hear of any new restaurant experiences in Toronto – do share in the comments!


Love & Light
B

Think Again by Adam Grant (my favourite ideas from the book)

I recently read Think Again by Adam Grant, and I annotated a lot. Here are the annotations. Hopefully they spark some interest in you to think again (or at least read the book!)

  • When people reflect on what it takes to be mentally fit, the first idea that comes to mind is usually intelligence. The smarter you are, the more complex problems you can solve – the faster you can solve them….yet in a turbulent world, there’s another set of cognitive skills that might matter more: the ability to rethink & unlearn
  • When it comes to our own knowledge and opinions, we often favour feeling right over being rights
  • When we think and talk, we often slip into the mindsets of three different professions: preachers, prosecutors and politicians…We go into preacher mode when our sacred beliefs are in jeopardy: we deliver sermons to protect and promote our ideas. We enter prosecutor when we recognized flaws in other peoples’s reasoning: we marshal arguments to prove them wrong and win our case. We shift into politician mode when we’re seeking to win over an audience: we campaign and lobby for approval of our constituents.
  • In psychology there are at least 2 biases that drive [our thinking]: Confirmation bias – see what we expect to see [and] the other is desirability bias: seeing what we want to see.
  • What set apart great presidents was their intellectual curiosity and openness.
  • Research shows that when people are resistant to change, it helps to reinforce what will stay the same. Visions for change are more compelling when they include visions of continuity. Although our strategy might evolve, our identity will endure.
  • In theory, confidence and competence go hand in hand. In practice, they often diverge.
  • The Dunning-Kruger effect – when we lack competence that we are most likely brimming with over-confidence
  • Advancing from notice to amateur can break the rethinking cycle. As we gain experience, we lose some of our humility.
  • Confidence Sweet Spot = Confident Humility
  • Attachment. That’s what keeps us from recognizing when our opinions are off the mark and rethinking them. To unlock the joy of being wrong, we need to detach.
  • If you want to be a better forecaster today, you need to let go of your commitments of the opinions you held yesterday.
  • Productive disagreement is a lifeskill none of us fully develop. Research shows that how often parents argue has no bearing on their children’s academic, social or emotional development.
  • In good fights are the tension is intellectual not emotional
  • Skilled negotiators: find common ground > ask questions > provide a # of reasons > defend attacks
  • After establishing the drawbacks of her case, she emphasized a few reasons to hire her anyway: But what I do have are skills that can't be taught. I take ownership of projects far beyond my pay grade and what is defined in my scope of responsibilities. I don't wait for people to tell me what do and seek for myself what needs to be done. I invest myself deeply in my projects and it shows in everything I do, from my projects at work to the projects I do in my own time. I'm entrepreneurial. I get things done. I love breaking new ground and starting with a blank slate.
  • As a general rule: its those with greater power that need to do more of the rethinking.
  • When we try to convince people to think again, our first instinct is usually to start talking. Yet the most effective way to help others open their minds is often to listen.
  • Inverse Charisma (the magnetic qualities of a great listener): a sense of being listened to with such intensity that you had to be your most honest, sharpest and best self.
  • As consumers of information, we have a role to play. When reading, listening or watching, we can learn to recognize complexity as a signal of credibility. We can favour content and sources that present many sides of an issue, rather than just one or two. When we come across simplifying headlines, we can fight out tendency to accept binaries by asking what additional perspectives are missing between these extremes.
  • In productive conversations, people treat feelings as a rough draft. Like art, emotions are works in progress. As we gain perspective, we revise what we feel.
  • We need to encourage students to question themselves and one another.
  • Lectures are entertaining and informative, the question is whether they are the ideal method of teaching. […] they actually gained more knowledge and skill from active learning sessions (sending students off to find answers instead of the teacher showing the students how to arrive at the answer). It required deeper mental effort, which made it less fun but led to deeper understanding.
  • Perfectionists are more likely than their peers to ace school, they don’t perform any better than their colleagues at work.
  • Respond to confusion with curiosity and interest aka “give time to your confusion”
  • Encourage children to do multiple drafts of the same drawing.
  • Psychological safety is the foundation of a learning culture
  • Best practices in corporate imply that we’ve stopped learning, […] instead we should looking for “better practices”
  • When psychological safety exists without accountability, people operate within their comfort zone.
  • Change the ownership of psychological safety. (ex: if she says that it’s not safe to launch, the team should prove that it is safe to launch)
  • Sometimes the best type of grit, is gritting your teeth and turning around.
  • It’s easy to be a scientist: it’s simply the act of experimenting

Prep for 2025 with me!

I love a new year because I love a fresh start. But a fresh start can happen any time. It can happen on a clear weekend, or a Monday morning. It can happen happen on a Friday afternoon, when school starts, or the new financial fiscal and the start of a new month. But a fresh start and some inspiration go a long way. Sharing some ways to prepare for the new year, following the 4Ms method: Mind, Money, Mouth & Mood

:: Mind ::

  • Continuous Learning
  • Regular Journalling
  • Make time for Creativity
  • Practice Mindfulness
  • Digital Detox

:: Money ::

  • Create a monthly Budget
  • Have a No-Spend day
  • Track your spending
  • Build your Savings
  • Create an investment account

:: Mouth ::

  • Reach for veggies & fruits first
  • Drink 3L of water
  • Eat enough protein
  • Limit Sugar
  • Track your food (calories or macros)

:: Mood ::

  • Be Grateful
  • Take Nature Walks
  • Practice Breathing Exercises
  • Have a good sleep routine
  • Find reasons to smile
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TWO days in Tobermory!

We’ve been wanting to do “the Tobermory trip” for several years now. Being tempted by all the stories of how picturesque the village is and turquoise waters. But actually experiencing it was breath taking. Sharing our experience for those who are making a trip to Tobermory.

*Pro Tips*

1- If you are planning your trip, start by checking out the booking websites for both Flowerpot Island (Cruise carriers) and the Grotto (Parking Reservations). Tobermory is a touristy spot and it’s encouraged to make your bookings several weeks in advance!

2 – Bring your re-usable water bottle and take advantage of the grocery story near by or pack food so that you can have breakfast at the hotel and lunch picnics during the day! Our motel had a fridge in room and a microwave & water cooler in the common area.

3 – You’ll need a few appropriate shoes: runners/hiking boots & water shoes/sandals with grips

Day 1 – Sauble Beach, Fish & Chips + wander around Tobermory Town

We drove out to Sauble Beach on a Friday. The beach is fantastic, lots of sandy space to set up an umbrella and a picnic. The water was a little chilly (most likely because of the wind and being the end of the summer) but still amazing to get a fresh dip! Highly recommend going on a weekday to avoid the crowds. There is plenty of paid parking right along the dune but it fills up fast!

Once we had enough of the sand and the waves, we drove for just over an hour to make it to the Tobermory Town in time for check in. We were staying Blue Bay Motel (one of the accommodations on the main street, well actually “Bay St”) and settled in. The motel is great, rooms are a good size and well kept! It’s on the opposite side of Little Tub Harbour and perfect location for walking EVERYWHERE. Right beside our accommodations was the The Fish & Chip Place. Food was pretty good and the portions were perfect.

We decided to take an exploratory stroll along Bay Street to work off that extra serving of tartar sauce. We checked out the Nature’s Gifts and The Sweet Shoppe. We also made a mental note of the other places we wanted to check out for the rest of the weekend.

Saturday – Flowerpot Island, Exploring the Town and Dinner

We were up bright and early for our trip to Flowerpot island. There are 2 tour companies that operate tours to Flowerpot island. We went with Blue Anchor mainly because of the larger glass bottom boat. The morning of we had to be at the ticket counter 1hour prior to our departure time and then at the departure dock, 30 minutes prior to departure. Parking was a available about 1km walk from the dock and there was a bathroom at the departure dock (which was helpful with the kiddos). Once we got on the boat, we secured seats right in front of the glass bottom and enjoyed the 40 min ride. There was both a guided and automated tour on the boat and the views were amazing. You could also make your way to the front or back of the boat for some great picture ops.

Once at Flower Pot island there is about a 5 km hike to the main “flowerpot” structures. It really is a site to see. We enjoyed the hike and took the time to walk along the trail (which follows the shoreline) as well as walk off the trail onto the rocks/large boulders. It was VERY busy, but everyone was taking turns getting their pictures. If you are really fussed by the people traffic, you can always switch to motion blur and get some really artistic shots. The kids loved traversing the rocky shore, having a picnic and just wandering.

We took the 2pm cruise back to Tobermory, which gave us a LOT of time to explore the Tub Town. We had coffee, explored the stores (and supported the local businesses), visited an art gallery as well as had dinner at Crownest Pub & Restaurant.

Sunday – Singing Sands, The Grotto & Home

Today was another big day of exploring. We checked out and made our wait to the Grotto parking. We were a little early (ok 45 minutes) so we weren’t actually allowed to enter the Grotto Parking, but the parking staff gave us a free pass to Singing Sands Park.

It’s a short drive from The Bruce Peninsula Park entrance. If you haven’t heard of it it’s a very very shallow body of water with EXTREMELY warm water and tiny tadpole fishes! Perfect for young kids. The sand is so soft and the entire site is accessibility friendly. But it wasn’t the star of our day ;)

It’s an easy 5km/30 min hike from the parking to the Grotto Beach. The trail is mostly flat but there are some nature made stairs so not completely accessible friendly. If you follow the trail right to the end and go left – you’ll go to the actual Grotto. The Grotto is beautiful, but tricky to walk down. WEAR STURDY SHOES. If you can get down there, I’m sure the photos would be amazing (fantastic rock formations, turqoise waters, caves and waves), but we stayed up top to be on the safe side.

Now if you go to the RIGHT, you get to the Grotto Beach. It’s a very rocky shoreline but you can enter the water and experience the very popular “Caribbean of Canada”. BRING WATER SHOES to truly enjoy the beach.

Overall the trip was worth it and glad we waited until the girls were a little older so they were able to easily do the hikes and enjoy the adventure. if you want to see more, check out my vlog on youtube!