Fall back into Action!

Posted on September 3, 2019 by Bhanu Misra Marya

“Soar, eat ether, see what has never been see; depart, be lost, but climb” // Edna St. Vincent Millay

I love September! Fresh start, crisp mornings, new recipes, tall boots, beautiful fall photography :)

September has always felt like the start of a New Year of Learning. And although I no longer am in school or formal education, it’s important for me to remember that I should continue to grow and learn. I try to do this as often and as easily I can by: doing new things, reading books, listening to podcasts/Ted Talks or simply by changing my perspective to understand a topic more deeply. I often forget that it’s okay to feel overwhelmed or confused some days. It’s on those days that I need to take a time to rest and recover but also not forget to keep my goal in mind and continue to scale that mountain.

I am taking this this upcoming month to fall back into action! I want to get back into good routines and stay focused. I put together this checklist to keep me motivated and ahead of my goals as we move into the colder months!

How to be a good mom? (it’s not what you think)

Posted on May 12, 2019 by Bhanu Misra Marya

Who agrees with me that we should rename mothers day to Mother Figures day.

We need to be more understanding to the people who don’t have a mom, to the people who’s relationship with their mom is strained at best, to the people who dread this day because it makes them feel inferior, to the people who’s dad’s, grand parent, step parent, foster parent, aunt/uncle are mother figures, to the mom’s who just want a moment of quiet without the feelings of guilt and definitely to the mom’s who don’t think they are doing anything right (when they are actually doing everything right!)

If there is anything I’ve learned in the almost 5 years of being a mom is that it’s a thankless job. It’s both exhilarating and anxiety inducing. It’s a job where you have to be flexible and ready to change to keep growing and build something real. It’s a job where you have to remain calm when everything is chaotic. A job where transparent communication are critical to success. A job where you have to lead with love (especially on the days you want to punch a wall or throw your coffee mug at a window).

But with all that said it doesn’t take a certain type of person, certain type of pregnancy, birth experience or even a certain type of upbringing to be a good mom.

To be a good mom you just have be a good human.

So if you are a good human or you know a good human who deserves a treat (mom, mom figure or non mom) hopefully you can find some inspiration below :)

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7

Book Review – Ishmeal

Posted on April 1, 2019 by Bhanu Misra Marya

I recently finished reading Ishmeal. Which is actually an accomplishment because I started it January 2018. But I stopped reading it, just around the time I ended my mat leave.

I was recently listening to a podcast where the guest was talking about how to read more books and he said that its totally okay to “quit so you can start”.

I couldn’t have agreed more. I’ve stopped many books. I mean for me, reading as an adult… is not school, I am not going to be judged if I didn’t finish a book, there is no essay requirement and definitely no quiz. I always give a book the benefit of the doubt and try to read 25 pages or so. But, if the book hasn’t peaked my interest I’ll stop and move on to another book. The best thing about choosing to stop reading a book is that it’s not final. You can always begin reading that book again. Which is exactly what I did here.

This book essentially is about how the earth is being destroyed by humans. So the premise of this book really appeals to me. It was written in the early 90s and the entire story (well 95%) of it takes place as a conversation between a gorilla and a human.

The conversations take the reader through different times of history from Adam/Eve (i.e. “the beginning”) era through to the 90s. The reader is meant to understand why humans believe the earth was made for them, that they are above the law of community and how they have not figured out a way to live in harmony with other creatures on earth. The author describes several cultural myths and biases that seem to give humans the “excuses” to rule over the earth and continue agricultural domination.

The book tip toes around primitivism and other extreme view points to help save the earth and allow humans to live in community with other species on earth. The book has a good message to humanity, I just couldn’t get behind the some-what-extreme solution provided.

A few of the important points I will take with me after reading this book:

humans belong to the world (not the other way around)
if your know something important share it with 100 people if they feel the message is also important they should share it with 100 people (and so on and so forth)
history should be re-examined so we can continually learn from our past

Check out the other books I’ve ready in 2019!

The grass is greener where you water it

Posted on February 20, 2019 by Bhanu Misra Marya

I recently wrote an article for an Employee Resource Group that I am part of. The topic I was given was the “Science behind happiness”. Although I was given this topic to write about, I became fascinated by the research behind happiness. Everything I read and presented in this article aligns with my thoughts so I figured I’d share my piece here too!

Did you know there is scientific research behind being happy? Believe it or not, happiness is not just reserved for the few lucky ones amongst us. Rather, every one of us can control our own happiness. Sonja Lyubomirsky renowned social psychologist and Ph.D. from Stanford has found that although 50% of our happiness is rooted in our genetics, the remaining combination is 10% our circumstances and 40% of our intentional activities.

So what exactly does that mean? Even though the science states that 50% of our happiness is due to our genetics, it’s actually an indirect relation, meaning there is always room for improvement – we can influence our genetic happiness by our experience and behaviour. More importantly, the other 50% of our happiness is essentially controlled by being aware of our circumstance and intentional about our thoughts, outlook and actions. Everyone has a choice and we can easily choose to be happy.

Why is this important? Being happy increases self-regulatory and coping abilities. Some scientists say that it can strengthen your immune system, make you more energetic and even allow you to enjoy a longer life. Plus, being happy is contagious! If you are happy and around happy people – the happiness keeps growing!

How can one practice cultivating happiness? Many of us may look to our careers, partners, family/children or other external forces to influence our happiness. What we need to remember is that happiness isn’t something we find, it’s something we create and practice daily. The research shows that activities we initiate from ourselves such as maintaining our fitness levels, counting one’s blessings and pursing personal goals are the key to happiness. Here are some other ways to cultivate happiness in your life:

– Practice acts of kindness (volunteering or charity work)

– Practice daily gratitude

– Avoid social comparisons

– Pursue a hobby

– Nurture relationships

– Focus on spirituality or a religious practices that speak to you

– Avoid over consumption on Social Media

– Taking care of your body and mind (being physically active, practicing self-care, meditating)

Book Review – The Sun and her Flowers

Posted on January 26, 2019 by Bhanu Misra Marya

My goal for this year is to read 10-12 books. I personally think it’s a little audacious for my current season of life. Mainly because I don’t have dedicated reading times and when I do read it’s very short spurts. On the train to work, while the kids are having a snack, in the car, while the kids are watching TV etc. It’s always interrupted and I’m not one of those people who can zip through a book in a few sittings.

Modern day poetry is all the rage these days! And after reading Cleo Wade’s book “Heart Talk” (which was an amazing book!) I was curious to read more poetry. I picked up “The Sun and her Flowers” by Rupi Kaur, solely based on the colour of the cover book. It’s bright and optimistic (as opposed to her 1st book, a dark and moody cover – which I subsequently never read!)

It’s a magical arrangement of words, emotions and intense story telling. This book of poetry is soulful, descriptive and relatable (being a 1st generation Indo-Canadian). I was more drawn to the poems in “rising” and “blooming”. Something I wasn’t expecting was the rawness of the poems in “wilting” and “falling”.

I feel like modern day poetry although still is emotional and heart wrenching like it’s traditional predecessors, is more about healing and self guiding. And that self-help aspect is not just for the writer but the reader as well.

Check out the other books I’ve ready in 2019!