Being a mom is hard. Being a mom in today’s world is hard.  Mom’s are working 24/7.  Some are being moms while possibly handling a business, others are working 7-10 hrs outside of the home and then coming home to do the most important work of all – being a mom!  We are pushed and pulled in a million different directions, sometimes out of our own decisions and often because we are needed (or think we are needed).  We put everyone else’s needs before our own, we are nurturers by nature, we cater to everyone, we feel like our homes need to be clean all the time, we eat left overs from our kids plates and drink cold coffee or tea.  We no longer have the same level of community that mothers of previous generations relied on.  And I don’t know if an online community of moms is the same thing? I mean can you call them over in a pinch to watch your kid? I am sure that mom’s have been judged for centuries, but it feels that we need to raise our children and break glass ceilings all at the same time.

And if all that wasn’t enough, we are dealing with a level of social comparison that is so intense it’s creating anxiety and unnecessary stress around holidays and special occasions.

Around valentines I read an Instagram post by a mom who didn’t feel compelled to send heart shaped sandwiches in her kids lunch, she didn’t bother getting valentines for her kid’s classmates or dressing her kids in red or pink.  She made the point because her feed was filled with other moms who were doing all the “things” to make the holiday “special” for kids.  She didn’t feel like doing any of it and wondered if she was the only one feeling inadequate.

I totally get it.   I completely agree that making magic is a tiresome task.  It’s yet another thing we need to add to our to do lists.

That said, I want to still do it.

I still want to put in the energy.  I still want to be present for those silly hallmark moments or cheesy opportunities to add a smile to my kid’s day.  I still want to make magic for them during the holidays.  Because that magic isn’t JUST for them, it isn’t for sharing on social media, it’s for me and my memories too.

The problem here is the social media aspect of it. When you are doing something for external validation, its never going to feel right.  So in the end you have to do what you feel is going to work for you, even if your friends are doing something different or when someone you admire isn’t on the same page as you.  It’s about being true to yourself and not about putting yourself out there to be judged by strangers on the internet 😚